The Butcher

I can grocery shop. No problem. I can not cook, but I can handle the shopping. With an exception. Please don’t send me to the butcher. It must have been almost a year since I went last time. With VERY specific instructions. I have never been in a real butcher’s shop before. I tell you what, I was freaked out. (This was even pre-vegan, and I absolutely love meat and will eat it for meals and snack stage of my life.) I walked in and there were lots of middle aged women, two meat counters, tons of staff wearing heavy aprons and plastic gloves. And I will admit I was shocked that they were all young high school girls. I thought maybe I should take a number…it seemed like one of those places where you would take one…but there was no number dispenser, so I just stood, and got a little dizzy surrounded by all these confident women who were prepping for their Sunday dinner. One lady kept pointing to different hunks of meat saying she wanted “that one, no, THAT one…) I saw no difference.

Finally it was my turn. I still had no idea where the meat was located that I was supposed to order. And I had my order memorized. “I would like 6 ______________(fill in the blank cause I have no memory of what I needed). She looked at me and started asking questions. Isn’t a steak a steak? Or a loin a loin and a chop a chop? Apparently not. She must have sensed my fear, the deer in headlights, trickle of sweat on my cheek, and she pointed. “Sure, I’ll take 6 of those” Then more questions… “Do you want them cut?, Packaged separately?” At this point I feel like I am taking the LSTAT or something. I gulp out a “no”. Then she proceeds to point: “How does this one look?” Now I am just angry. “Just give me 6 I don’t care which ones and I don’t know anything else.”

Paid and back in the comfort of my car I swore of specialty shopping. I occasionally get tripped up in the grocery store when I am told to get a sweet onion (well their are red, yellow, white and brown, which one is sweet????) or Chickpeas…(aka Garbanzo beans).

Today Josh asked me to go to the butcher again. He asked me to get 3.5 pounds of ground beef. I begged him to let me get it at the grocery store. He said it is cheaper and better at Bob’s Butcher block. So I talk myself into it. It is just ground beef. I can handle that. I walk into the store, it is not very busy. I stand in front of the meat counter. No one acknowledges me. So I pretend to look. Then do that waiting look again. Finally another cute high school girl comes to help me. “Can I get 3.5 pounds of ground beef?” And with out missing a beat she says: “How would you like that packaged?” WHAT! I was not told the answer to this question! I froze. “Do you want it all together or in seperate packages?” I do not know the right answer is. So I play it cool and sweetly say “Whatever is easiest for you”. She gives me a weird look and puts it all in one package. I pay and bolt.

And just in case you don’t know… a sweet onion is yellow : )

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